PARTY!!!!! 1ST OF DEC!!!

PEOPLE READIN THIS AND ARE MY FRIENDS!!! UR INVITED!!! ON THE 1ST OF DEC THERE WILL BE A PARTY!!! AT MY FARM!! INTERESTED??? 

CALL ME O EMAIL ME AT U NOE LA!!!

Distance of the heart... An e-mail from a close fren which is so tru...

though this is an old email tat my fren sent me... but i wanna share wif u guys... those who noe how to read chinese... hahaz...

THANK YOU~

Its kinda nostalgic after given de same answer by de same person... heh... but nw i'm free... i've dreamt of touchin tat bittersweet blue sky.. but through the way i fell... fell and i got myself hurt... hehe... finally a giggle... sigh.. a sigh of relief and a sigh of sadness... it overwhelms my heart... but i think its also a sign of relief... i feel a whole lot better after gettin de answer... and its like tat blue sky is moving on... and a new dawn is coming... that stone... wait.. boulder tat crushed my senses have been relieved and taken away... i c things more clearly nw... for that i thank you... thank you for teachin me how to grow up... thank you for havin telling me the truth... u'll always be my special someone... heh... my special fren... thanx....

finally my mind is free... free from all tots... thanks... thank you... from the bottom of my cold blue heart...

another post another heartache...

i guess i wont be tellin wad i wanna tell u thru msn i guess.. i can only hope tat u really will read it in my blog... my feelings.. all of it in this post... -BIG SIGH- its been like forever since i've talked to u.. but today... finally today i open tat big fat useless pipe-hole of mine and spoke to u... though there's not much point in talkin... all ur answers are flat and monotone... haiz... but it is already a big relieve tat i spoke to u... it some how blowed some of my troubles away just listenin to ur voice.. but in tat voice i felt tat there's somethin u wanna tell me.. maybe its jz a wrong guess... haiz... i also found out tat ur sick... i've reminded u always to take care of urself... haiz... maybe its jz tat i'm such a worrywart... haiz...


enough bout her for this moment and let me recap one wad i am and did durin this week...

1. missin her like missin de world
2. test... trial... killin me...
3. still missin her like nth else matters
4. listenin to how to say... emo songs... techno and deep trance
5. finally talked to her
6. still need to find out things bout her

thats all for the week i guess... haiz... my head has been like shoutin STUDY IQBAL!!! but my heart is shoutin... screamin... I AM HOOKED ONTO U!!! haiz... too different major organ functionin in a stupid useless organism...

never mind... been motivatin myself... with my msn pm... just let it go...

if u guys wanna noe wad is my pm then here it is...

If you love somebody, let them go. If they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were.

i think its quite true... i hope she'll give me de answer one day... and i hope she noes how i feel bout her... and i really hope tat she'll read these post that is meant for her... and noe wad to do...

the urge to blog.... letting off steam...

hey guys.. i think its been forever since i post a new entry... i broke my promise to myself...

Matter no.1 going on in my head

hhaiz... am such and ass... haiz... feelings inside of me... thoughts goin through me... its all..... A HUGE MESS!!! $#@%#@$#@%$#@^$# haiz.... its not the first time like this.. but why does it happen... i'm confused... i'm like having a fight in my brain... going on everytime every hour every minute... one part says... SPM!!!! the other says... She's jz in front of u... go get her... both got their reasons... both are killin me... haiz... i'm so so so SO useless... couldn even write a proper blog.... haiz... den i start to compare myself to the others.. i found out... tat i'm jz a piece of... Sh**t.... haiz...

Matter no.2 going on in my head

the second thing is still her.... i dunno why..... its jz her.... i'm drownin myself in deep trance techno now... talk about kill joy... haiz... wish i still had tat pack of ********* wif me... haiz... den i can let off some of my steam... but i got rid of it... so.... stay healthy.... i gotta get my head back into study now... but i jz cant... haiz.....

Matter no.3 going on in my head

i cant think of anythin... o god... will u jz let me die... i'm feeling miserable... but i don wan this feeling to go... how ironic eh.... haiz... humans are always like this... they... we don wanna let go of anythin.....

Matter of frenz

frenz around me..... i tot i had loads of frenz... but i finally noe tat i only hav a few frenz i can really let my steam off... thanks guys... gonna miss u when i move to qatar... some frenz r jz to hav fun wif... in my case... most of them... i wanna b closer wif u guys... but sometimes... i jz find this wall blocking us.... not only wif my frenz....

but wif "u" also... the wall between u grown even bigger... AAAAAARRRRGGGHHHHH!!! how come i always go back to her???? call it lust... call it a way of runnin... but i jz cant get u outta my head... i think i'm really sick.... sickly in...... haiz.... i think i'll leave it here now... hope u read this and understand how i really feel... i jz wan u to noe tat this guys is officially hooked on to u...

My FiNaL EnTRy

this is my final entry... so meaning fromnow onwards this blog will be a distant memory.. so i'll make this entry a somewhat special one??? i wanna thank all my frenz for being with me... i wanna thanks some of those who intro me to bloggin.. but i'm just to lazy to write.. only once in a blue moon... a really blue one i might say.. hahaz... thanks everyone... i love u guys... i dunno wad to say actually... haiz... but this blog is jz a shout out to everyone i really care bout.. i've changed.. not for the better but for the worst.... haiz... i'm sorry guys... SORRY!!!! but i still really appreciate u guys for being there with me... for ur ppl's info... i maybe movin to qatar next year... so bye malaysia... bye guys... bye 'u'... bye..................... when i come back i will be someone else... from the outside.. and a better person inside(hope so)... i dunno wad to write.. but my fingers are just writing it on my own... o ya... i may start a new blog... but i think tats only if its destined... hahaz... so if i start a new blog i'll tell u guys... hahaz... final entry... first hello... final goodbye...



bye guyz....

urs one and only..

iqbal aka bao aka ah bao aka baobao aka yi bao aka ah bao ge aka bao ge

差一点~ 这是我的差一点~

a song by a-du
this song reli is meaningful u can go and listen to it..
this is de lyrics..

差一点你就是我的女人
差一些手牵手的完整
却在对的时间错过对的人
抓不住幸福时分
遇上了错的人渐渐的吻在她无心的嘴唇
感觉像一个旅程走完了就分
错过了对的人,决定就只在那一秒那一分
爱情的岔口,你是我等不到的路人
差一点你就是我的女人
差一些就和你共度一生
因为对的时间对的人
就值得我为你奋不顾身
差一点你就是我的女人
差一些手牵手的完整
却在对的时间错过对的人
抓不住幸福时分
错过了对的人
定就只在那一秒那一分
如果没缘分
我也会固执的为你一人
差一点你就是我的女人
差一些就和你共度一生
因为对的时间对的人
就值得我为你奋不顾身
差一点你就是我的女人
差一些手牵手的完整
却在对的时间错过对的人
抓不住幸福时分


this song is wad i've been listenin to this past few days.. even if i'm happy o sad.. but to me happy and sad is all nth now.. coz now i lost wad i cherished most.. maybe it was the wrong time.. maybe its just that i'm no the one.. but at least i had my chance.. coz i'm happy wad we've been thru.. a break... maybe tats wad we need.. but i hope its not a long one..