going back to the basics

this title may seem weird.. but its got its own meaning... to me it means finding my old self... the one i left behind.. the one that most of my "frenz" knew... ya... the old me... ppl think tat everything new is good... but i don... some old stuff are great.. for example... vintage wine.. the longer the wine the better it is... when i think bout this i realize.. i cant change who i am now.. all i can do is move forward.. i cant be my old self... coz who i am now is me... and my old self is another person... i've changed... i do admit tat... change for the worse?? o for the better?? some ppl hate me now i guess... but i've got one thing to tell them... u aint so good urself... when people change... adept wif them... change ur point of view... don keep stayin the old coot u are... change.... EVERYONE is destined to change...

ok... finished wif the change thing now... back to the basics... wad does it means?? i've told u one of my opinion... tell me urs...

when i ask a fren of mine.. wad does it means to him... u noe wad he said??

Change style of "kao lui" to the most simple style... i was like WTF??? wat kinda bullshit is tat...  maybe his life is jz bout chasing girls and stuff... but another view of mine is.....

well should i say it?? i think i should.... but wad if its also bullshit??? well who cares??? 

well my view is almost but at a different level of my frenz opinion... mine is how to make frenz...

ya... frenz... some ppl take this word lightly... u hav loads of frenz... so wat?? can u tell every bit of secret to them?? i cant... coz i noe... my frenz... some of them spill their guts out... some of them jz keep it to themselves... i respect both... but who i think is a real fren is... someone who hold no secrets wif another fren...

having no secrets between two ppl... able to laugh.. able to cry... telling ur sorrows... telling ur joy... that is wad i call FRIENDS... i envy those ppl who have real FRIENDS.. but after my high school yrs.. i did find a few.. i wil cherish them... i will love them... i am nth without them...

guys.. i thank you... for being my FRIENDS...

PARTY!!!!! 1ST OF DEC!!!

PEOPLE READIN THIS AND ARE MY FRIENDS!!! UR INVITED!!! ON THE 1ST OF DEC THERE WILL BE A PARTY!!! AT MY FARM!! INTERESTED??? 

CALL ME O EMAIL ME AT U NOE LA!!!

Distance of the heart... An e-mail from a close fren which is so tru...

though this is an old email tat my fren sent me... but i wanna share wif u guys... those who noe how to read chinese... hahaz...

THANK YOU~

Its kinda nostalgic after given de same answer by de same person... heh... but nw i'm free... i've dreamt of touchin tat bittersweet blue sky.. but through the way i fell... fell and i got myself hurt... hehe... finally a giggle... sigh.. a sigh of relief and a sigh of sadness... it overwhelms my heart... but i think its also a sign of relief... i feel a whole lot better after gettin de answer... and its like tat blue sky is moving on... and a new dawn is coming... that stone... wait.. boulder tat crushed my senses have been relieved and taken away... i c things more clearly nw... for that i thank you... thank you for teachin me how to grow up... thank you for havin telling me the truth... u'll always be my special someone... heh... my special fren... thanx....

finally my mind is free... free from all tots... thanks... thank you... from the bottom of my cold blue heart...

another post another heartache...

i guess i wont be tellin wad i wanna tell u thru msn i guess.. i can only hope tat u really will read it in my blog... my feelings.. all of it in this post... -BIG SIGH- its been like forever since i've talked to u.. but today... finally today i open tat big fat useless pipe-hole of mine and spoke to u... though there's not much point in talkin... all ur answers are flat and monotone... haiz... but it is already a big relieve tat i spoke to u... it some how blowed some of my troubles away just listenin to ur voice.. but in tat voice i felt tat there's somethin u wanna tell me.. maybe its jz a wrong guess... haiz... i also found out tat ur sick... i've reminded u always to take care of urself... haiz... maybe its jz tat i'm such a worrywart... haiz...


enough bout her for this moment and let me recap one wad i am and did durin this week...

1. missin her like missin de world
2. test... trial... killin me...
3. still missin her like nth else matters
4. listenin to how to say... emo songs... techno and deep trance
5. finally talked to her
6. still need to find out things bout her

thats all for the week i guess... haiz... my head has been like shoutin STUDY IQBAL!!! but my heart is shoutin... screamin... I AM HOOKED ONTO U!!! haiz... too different major organ functionin in a stupid useless organism...

never mind... been motivatin myself... with my msn pm... just let it go...

if u guys wanna noe wad is my pm then here it is...

If you love somebody, let them go. If they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were.

i think its quite true... i hope she'll give me de answer one day... and i hope she noes how i feel bout her... and i really hope tat she'll read these post that is meant for her... and noe wad to do...

the urge to blog.... letting off steam...

hey guys.. i think its been forever since i post a new entry... i broke my promise to myself...

Matter no.1 going on in my head

hhaiz... am such and ass... haiz... feelings inside of me... thoughts goin through me... its all..... A HUGE MESS!!! $#@%#@$#@%$#@^$# haiz.... its not the first time like this.. but why does it happen... i'm confused... i'm like having a fight in my brain... going on everytime every hour every minute... one part says... SPM!!!! the other says... She's jz in front of u... go get her... both got their reasons... both are killin me... haiz... i'm so so so SO useless... couldn even write a proper blog.... haiz... den i start to compare myself to the others.. i found out... tat i'm jz a piece of... Sh**t.... haiz...

Matter no.2 going on in my head

the second thing is still her.... i dunno why..... its jz her.... i'm drownin myself in deep trance techno now... talk about kill joy... haiz... wish i still had tat pack of ********* wif me... haiz... den i can let off some of my steam... but i got rid of it... so.... stay healthy.... i gotta get my head back into study now... but i jz cant... haiz.....

Matter no.3 going on in my head

i cant think of anythin... o god... will u jz let me die... i'm feeling miserable... but i don wan this feeling to go... how ironic eh.... haiz... humans are always like this... they... we don wanna let go of anythin.....

Matter of frenz

frenz around me..... i tot i had loads of frenz... but i finally noe tat i only hav a few frenz i can really let my steam off... thanks guys... gonna miss u when i move to qatar... some frenz r jz to hav fun wif... in my case... most of them... i wanna b closer wif u guys... but sometimes... i jz find this wall blocking us.... not only wif my frenz....

but wif "u" also... the wall between u grown even bigger... AAAAAARRRRGGGHHHHH!!! how come i always go back to her???? call it lust... call it a way of runnin... but i jz cant get u outta my head... i think i'm really sick.... sickly in...... haiz.... i think i'll leave it here now... hope u read this and understand how i really feel... i jz wan u to noe tat this guys is officially hooked on to u...

My FiNaL EnTRy

this is my final entry... so meaning fromnow onwards this blog will be a distant memory.. so i'll make this entry a somewhat special one??? i wanna thank all my frenz for being with me... i wanna thanks some of those who intro me to bloggin.. but i'm just to lazy to write.. only once in a blue moon... a really blue one i might say.. hahaz... thanks everyone... i love u guys... i dunno wad to say actually... haiz... but this blog is jz a shout out to everyone i really care bout.. i've changed.. not for the better but for the worst.... haiz... i'm sorry guys... SORRY!!!! but i still really appreciate u guys for being there with me... for ur ppl's info... i maybe movin to qatar next year... so bye malaysia... bye guys... bye 'u'... bye..................... when i come back i will be someone else... from the outside.. and a better person inside(hope so)... i dunno wad to write.. but my fingers are just writing it on my own... o ya... i may start a new blog... but i think tats only if its destined... hahaz... so if i start a new blog i'll tell u guys... hahaz... final entry... first hello... final goodbye...



bye guyz....

urs one and only..

iqbal aka bao aka ah bao aka baobao aka yi bao aka ah bao ge aka bao ge

差一点~ 这是我的差一点~

a song by a-du
this song reli is meaningful u can go and listen to it..
this is de lyrics..

差一点你就是我的女人
差一些手牵手的完整
却在对的时间错过对的人
抓不住幸福时分
遇上了错的人渐渐的吻在她无心的嘴唇
感觉像一个旅程走完了就分
错过了对的人,决定就只在那一秒那一分
爱情的岔口,你是我等不到的路人
差一点你就是我的女人
差一些就和你共度一生
因为对的时间对的人
就值得我为你奋不顾身
差一点你就是我的女人
差一些手牵手的完整
却在对的时间错过对的人
抓不住幸福时分
错过了对的人
定就只在那一秒那一分
如果没缘分
我也会固执的为你一人
差一点你就是我的女人
差一些就和你共度一生
因为对的时间对的人
就值得我为你奋不顾身
差一点你就是我的女人
差一些手牵手的完整
却在对的时间错过对的人
抓不住幸福时分


this song is wad i've been listenin to this past few days.. even if i'm happy o sad.. but to me happy and sad is all nth now.. coz now i lost wad i cherished most.. maybe it was the wrong time.. maybe its just that i'm no the one.. but at least i had my chance.. coz i'm happy wad we've been thru.. a break... maybe tats wad we need.. but i hope its not a long one..

Eerrr.... MaJoR writer's block

writer's block is happenin from this afternoon.... after de exam all my switch in my brain was like all turn off.... i was like dead man walking.... but was glad everythin is over.. yea... holi.... big whopee = =" like i'm having holi...... hav tonnes of revision to catch up.. hz... only thing is don need to get up early.... mdm ling gave us like hw for hol..... haiz... but as for chem.... need my revision... o not die liao la... here are my test forecast:

Chinese: dunno wad to say bout it... maybe just ITS SUCKS!!!! god damn it... i'm a malay(actually confessing) don u noe tat we dunno chinese... hahaz... my mom!!! y u force me~~
BM: PASS IS JUST A MIRACLE!!!!!
BI: PLEASE LORD AN "A" THIS TIME PLEASE~~
M3: a solid "B" is a thank u.....
M+: "C" please...
BIO: ONE WORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FFFFFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!
CHEM: "B" Pleassseeee..... i wan a "B" nya.....
PHY:paassssssss mmmmeeee llllllaaaa mdm ha....
SEJ: SAME AS BIO!!!!
PI: A MIRACLE I NOE HOW TO DO!!!! +.+
EST: miss chew.... please let me passs......

RanDom PoSt

ITS BEEN SSSSOOOO LONG SINCE MY LAST BLOG~~DuNo Why I'm In a MoOd To TyPe ThIS WaY BuT BeEAAR WiF ME~~ ok.... got over tat stage.. sigh~~ TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST~~~~~~ i'M DANG TIRED OF IT~~ why do we hav test~~ if u noe noe la... why need to test... if good good la... if stupid stupid la... DANG the board of edu... hz... relli stress by test... haven even study a bit... and tomolo is de "BIG" day... fuku... haiz... anyways... i think i'll just put some random pic on my blog la... since i got nth else to do.. and i need to off in a while.... ITS TOTALLY RANDOM~~~ HAHAZ



tuition stuff????


pizza from pizza hut.. =.= one of legend's work..


guanliang... so close...


dunno who took this...


another one...

AFTER A LONG TIME OF WAITING~~~~

wth??!!! SIGH~~ i've been neglecting my blog... so all of u waiting for my new post here it is.. not much happen since i left off... crashing into dad's fren's car usin my dad's car... almost quitted... yadah2... u noe... de usual's... like yea rite... hahaz... anywayz... i hope tat i can post more often... hahaz... been skipping alot of classes recently... and get to gossip like wad... hahaz... but i don think anythin else happen... o ya... today science exhibition... lolx... get to disect the frogs again and again... muahahahaz... kinda addicted to disectin things... hahaz... i think i only hav this to say for this entry... till next time... hahaz...

Learning to edit my blog... hahaz...

I'm learnin how to edit my blog... hahaz.. after seeing my frenz blogs.. i feel that i'm so small... and insufficient... T.T but i'm trying my best to improve.. on my blogging, driving, studying... etc etc... i hope my blog would look better now.. but i think its almost de same.. hahaz.... still got something tat i still dunno... hahaz...

My homey legend

Random Post... GRRRR~~~

hahaz... been three o was it two days tat i havne touch my blog.. i got loads of stuff to unload...
first of all... had a tirin weekend.. had to drive myself around... den had drama practice.. den played tennis wif my peeps... fun fun fun... but i did get scold by my mom for disobeying her... den de stupid fudgin red car's clutch is fudgin hard to use... like someone grease it la please.. fuku.. den i got my hair cut... sweet... but dunno can do myself o not.. post it next time la.. hahaz... den i still got work to do now.. so i'll just say bye bye for now...

Post Number Two (mornin school life)

this is my second blog since yesterday.... not really sure if i can not let blogging interrupt wif my life.. hopefully i can control myself.. hahaz.. today is another day at school... duty.. school work... teachers.. frenz... but today was only a wee bit different.. frenz got their name corrupted ( put it in a way) on de internet.. hz... de misusing of blog.. hopefully this will not happen again... besides from tat my effin drivin teacher postpone my test till the 10th.. though this is not any new news.. but still freaking piss me off.. making me think bout tat matter always end up in a rhythmic slang of "beautiful vocabulary".. but i think i felt somewhat better after telling this.. hahaz... so anyways.. i think tats most probably out of my entire school day... maybe gonna post another entry tonite... hahaz... seeing tat my parents r not at home... hahaz... kinda miss them already...this er.... another writer's block... hahaz.... anyways... gotta study hard for spm ( lame ).... hahaz... i think tats all i got for this entry...

My first entry into the bloggin world...

well there's first time for everythin i gues.. never knew tat i wud go into bloggin.. hahaz...
my first entry... wow.. a big step in my bloggin life.. havin writers block now..
seriously dunno wad to write.. is it coz i'm nervous o i dunno how to express myself..
o maybe is coz i jz hav to many jumbled up feeling inside of me.. hahaz...
haiz... dunno why my laughter now is getting really fake.. am i having too much stress o wad??
haiz... eh??? i jz put in my first thought no second thought of de day.. good job iqbal... hahaz...
who am i kidding.. i'm just making a laughing stock out of myself.. but tats how i define who i am..
maybe i need a new point of view.. who noes ppl will like de new me.. hahaz... who am i kidding..
change is hard.. but for a person to be come better its a must for de person to change.. to adept..
if not u'll be rejected by this unfair world... i think tats all for my first entry.. hope i can write more.. hahaz... ciao for now~~